I have not slept a wink since 3am.
Too many things are going through my head. I’m not the wisest person on earth so I can’t tell you that I have all this wisdom to share but what I do have is experience beyond my years that I intend to share. My mind is such a whirlpool of melting thoughts and passing ideas and constant craving for accomplishments. We as humans are always evolving, moving on to the next thing for example : Girls want to be women, women want to be mothers, mothers want to be grandmothers and grandmothers want to see what’s next. It’s perfectly normal to want to know what’s next, to try to understand where your journey is taking you.
I think what I really need to work on is not shaming myself for wanting more or thinking what’s next for Jael. I feel like I have been at the same level for a very long time and I want to know what’s next… What steps do I take to ensure that I’m getting the best out of my life? How do I take these steps without offending anyone or causing chaos?
I have so many passing thoughts of where I’m suppose to be or how life is supposed to be by now. It’s crazy that I can never be satisfied with my position no matter where I am. My personality is to always strive for more… It’s a blessing and a curse. But I know there will come a time when all of my hustling, midnight journaling, Instagram strategizing, education on certain topics, schooling and side businesses will pay off. Everything will workout in due time. I am almost positive, yeah I have my doubts but they haven’t helped me so I choose to believe because faith is better than fear.